Only a few days after I made the announcement to some friends that I was looking for a part-time job I received an email that an Administrative Assistant position was going to be open in the Outreach department of my church. I quickly emailed the Director of the department to let him know I was interested.
Over a month, and three interviews later, I was contacted and told that they had chosen someone else for the position. My heart was broken.
I had prayed
I had fasted
Many friends had prayed
Others had spoken on my behalf
.....but God said no.
Tears were immediate after the phone call, the disappointment running deep. My mind was a whirlwind of thoughts and emotions that I couldn't put words to, even for my husband. He knows the disappointment, and he's patiently waiting for the words to come from within.
Yesterday was a day of reflection, an inventory of my emotions.
How do we react when God says no to our dreams?
I've wanted to work for my church for a long time now. It is an amazing place with God sized dreams. The Holy Spirit is alive within and I want to be a part of that movement! Do I allow myself to be mad at God? Do I build up resentment for those I interviewed with? Do I quit going to that church? Do I hide whenever I encounter the staff that know I had interviewed for the position?
What would it say of my faith if I rebelled
against my God
"For my thoughts are not your thoughts, neither are your ways my ways," declares the LORD. Isaiah 55:8
"In his heart a man plans his course, but the LORD determines his steps." Proverbs 16:9
"Many are the plans in a man's heart, but it is the LORD's purpose that prevails." Proverbs 19:21
I don't know God's reasons, but I do know that I must trust Him with the answer, even when it is no. Faith isn't grown only from the yes's and the blessings God bestows, but is also grown from the pain and disappointment in the denials.
I praise HIM
Because He is the I AM
plans to give you hope and a future.