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Wednesday, August 24, 2011

Do You Ever Feel "Out of Order"?

Do you ever feel like hanging this sign around your neck and calling it a day?

I mean, I've gotten used to those days that I just don't feel like doing much, and I do have more of those than I would care to admit!  But recently it was something different....something deeper.

Being constantly aware with my ongoing fight against depression, I tend to have a more critical eye when it comes to analyzing what I am feeling.  I've experienced it enough times to be hyper-critical as to not miss the signs of an onset.  That wasn't it.

As I worked through my thoughts and feelings, I discovered I had a tape playing in my head, and it was on constant repeat:  "You're not good enough."  "You're doing it all wrong." "You're not doing enough."  I was under a constant barrage all day long.  No matter what task I was working on, the voice kept badgering me.

I finally identified the feeling that was different.  It was failure.

The voice was right.  I'm lousy at housekeeping, my husband is doing all the laundry, I couldn't put two thoughts together to write an interesting blog post, my kids need more spiritual guidance, I am not praying enough, God wants more from me, my kids need more discipline and structure, our finances are a mess and I'm never going to be able to change, my husband wants more intimacy, I need to volunteer more at church, the dog needs more attention
......................press repeat...........................

OUT OF ORDER!

Have you been there?  Has there been a voice inside your head grow louder and louder until you can no longer hear the true voice of God?  Because God doesn't cast shame or guilt upon us.  Do you need to read that last sentence again?  God's voice whispers words of love, acceptance and encouragement.  Perhaps today we need to sit still in the quiet for just a few moments and ask God to push STOP on that tape of lies that is running through our heads.

All of those character flaws written above that I struggle with may still be there, and through God's strength I will continue to work to conquer them, but they DO NOT define me as a failure.  As the tape continued to play through my mind, the lies got bolder and louder.  But as I take time to analyze the recording, I see that through the grace of God, each and every day, the blessings around me abound.  My husband loves serving me, my girls are beautiful and healthy, we all love the Lord, and the dog is fine.

And the God of all grace, who called you to his eternal glory in Christ, after you have suffered a little while, will himself restore you and make you strong, firm and steadfast. I Peter 5:10


iFellowship


15 comments:

  1. yes. I have "out of order" sign days. thanks for the words of encouragement. happy day to you!

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  2. Those Our of Order days are tough....but isn't it amazing that all we have to do is grab onto Him and He will pull us through them??!

    Happy Wednesday!

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  3. Thanks for this great encouragement, Cherie. I needed to hear it today. That recording has gotten way loud lately!

    ~Lisa-Jo

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  4. beautiful thoughts for today... so encouraging to know we all walk the same road!

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  5. Whether we would like to admit it or not, we've all had those days I think. Some more than others. I tend to be hyper critical of myself as well. But God's grace abounds in our weakness. Praise the Lord! Thank you for this heartfelt and encouraging post.

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  6. oh my goodness...even though the kids are grown and gone I have those out of order days too. Thank you for this encouraging word.

    joy and blessings,
    Alida

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  7. I definitely have those days...today was close. However, I have learned to say out loud, "These thoughts are not from God and I command you to go in the Name of Jesus!" It is amazing how much my head clears up after that.

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  8. Gosh I really needed to read this today. The voices were winnIng the battle of my mind. Xx

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  9. What a truely excellent post! I'm really glad I came across it. I have a lot of "out-of-order" days, and really need to stop listening to the lies in my head, and focus more on God and start listening to the truth, and have more "in-working-order" days. Thanks for this post!

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  10. I have felt "out-of-order" lately. Needing to do something for the fam but God's not opening the doors - so I'm just waiting - feeling kind of _out-of-order. Thanks for the encouraging post. Kind of needed it!

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  11. I have been feeling "out-of-order" for a while. My laundry baskets are overflowing and I have so much I need to do around the house. I can never seem to do what I need to do to get caught up. So thankful for His grace that gets me through each day.

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  12. Yes, I definitely have those days also. It is good to know that there are others who have those same type of days. Thank you for your words of encouragement!

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  13. Sound like my yesterday! Satan loves for us to get hung up on ME so we can't see what God had in store forr us that day. Keep on keeping on! Debbie

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  14. Wow this is so timely for me today. I came across your blog on the seeds of faith ifellowship and God surely has a sense of humor. Thank you for this.

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  15. today I feel like the sign I saw on the petrol pump yesterday: Out of Order. So full of petrol, yet no means of accessing it. So full, yet feeling so empty. People relying on me, yet not being able to supply the help they need. They'll have to go and fill up else where today ... until this pump is ready to flow again.

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